Episode #15 – Differing Family Memories

Welcome back. On this, the fourth Thursday, we answer your writing questions. Today’s question is, “What if my family’s memories don’t match my own?”

You can assuredly count on it because people remember things differently. For decades, psychologists have studied memory and how multiple people remember the same events in various ways.

If you want to learn why this happens and how to handle it when you write, this episode is for you.

As you commit your life to paper, you’ll almost certainly have to cross this bridge, so watch closely and jot down notes, so you’ll be ready when you do.

Here’s a bit of a bonus. Two videos!

If you want to experience how people see and experience moments differently, watch The Monkey Business Illusion video.

How do you deal with family members or others who remember events differently from you? Tell us about it in the comments section below.

If you liked what you just watched, sign up to be notified of future vlog posts and upcoming events and use the buttons below to share this episode on social media or with a friend who might enjoy it.

Until next time, happy writing!

Notify of
Oldest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Betty Patterson
1 year ago

My brother and I were having a heated argument about an event that occurred about 50 years ago. A deep dive into a box of old photos ended it. 

Lou Martindale
1 year ago

Excellent advice, Patricia. When I found out my sister was taking the stories I emailed to our mother and changing the “facts” I began sending locked PDF’s. At the beginning of each story and in the preface of my notebook containing a collection of my stories, I state, “This is my story as I remember it.”

Kit Dwyer
1 year ago
Reply to  Lou Martindale

Wow, Lou; some people! You certainly had reason to have to encrypt the originals.

Deborah Hunt Repp
1 year ago

As always, Patricia, you (and Lloyd) are spot-on. Just a year ago, a cousin reminded me that he had named one of my horses…not me. I just kept smiling.

Etya Krichmar
1 year ago

Before Patricia mentioned Lloyd, I already had my answer. This is what I remember. You don’t like it, go and write what you remember. My book, my memories.

Linda Peterson
1 year ago

As many of you know, I come from a large family, all of which I have consulted for portions of my memoir. The one sister claims she practically remembers the day she was born! As Patricia advises,
I verify what I can verify (I’m an amateur genealogist}, and leave the rest to my interpretation.

Would love your thoughts, please comment.x