Happy Mother’s Day to all of you who have children or served as maternal mentors or role models for others.
I visited my mom this afternoon and brought her a treat, but I’m unsure what mother to celebrate today.
Is it the woman who weighs fifty-five pounds, lives deep in dementia, rarely speaks, and when she does, it’s just a jumble of words and sounds with no order or meaning? Is it the woman worn out from fifteen years of caring for my father with Alzheimer’s Disease who disappeared inside herself after his death in 2018?
Or is it the career woman who worked outside her home long before most other women did and rose to the position of chief deputy assessor in our parish government? Or the creative one who painted, taught craft classes, carved ducks and other birds out of blocks of wood with a pocketknife?
Or the one who always wanted to be a teacher and finally got a chance when she prepared six-year-olds to make their First Communion in the Catholic Church?
Do I celebrate the woman whose house and yard resembled the Osborne Family Spectacle at Christmastime with thousands of lights, Santa’s sleigh pulled by eight giant crawfish up on the roof, and 101 wooden dalmatians she cut on my dad’s band saw and painted by hand so each would have a different array of spots?
Maybe, it’s the woman whose three acres of yard, landscaped and decorated with blooms of all kinds, or the one who loved to cut grass on her riding lawnmower and sing at the top of her lungs because she knew no one could hear her?
It’s difficult to find that woman in the body of bones covered by loose skin, eyes that no longer focus, and joints frozen into a permanent fetal position.
I look long for her as she sucks down the strawberry smoothie I hold for her.
I tell her happy Mother’s Day, I love her, and I’m glad she’s my mom.
But I miss the woman my mom used to be.
So, who are you celebrating today? What mother has made a difference in your life?
Remember, the only way to do this wrong is to not do it at all.
Until next time, happy writing.
There’s still time to join our Free Three-Day Writing Challenge, which kicks off tomorrow, Monday, May 15, at 6:00 p.m. ET. Check it out here.
Please note: All grammatical and typographical errors have been put in this article for
your enjoyment in finding them.
Patricia,
What a touching story about your mother. I especially loved the picture you included. You are your mother’s daughter. Thanks for sharing!
You brought tears to my eyes, Patricia. Your mother is making the long, heartbreaking, goodbye, as apparently your father did also. I am so very sorry for the pain you suffer. The picture you shared of your parents clearly shows their joie de vivre and how delighted they must have been to celebrate 50 years of marriage. I don’t presume to know exactly how you feel, but I think I have some idea. My witty, talented and generous sister-in-law daily ebbs farther and farther away from us. Recognizing no one, she exists in her own lonely Alzheimer’s-world. It’s unbelievably sad… Read more »
What a touching tribute as you considered the many facets of your mother’s life. Alzheimer’s sucks and is a horrid disease. I wish it was part of no one’s story. That such a lovely photo of your parents and I can see your similarity in their faces, especially in your mother’s laugh. This was the first Mother’s day since my mother passed. I marked the one year anniversary a few days before with wearing her lavender top as I took a visit to the inpatient hospice center she departed at. A few friends came and sang a meaningful dong, read… Read more »
I was really touched by your memories and now your visits with your mother. Sad too. But how beautiful your thoughts. I can only be grateful for my mother living long and being pretty healthy. Your words encourage me to look back on my life with her and find the loving moments. Thank you
Thank you Patricia for sharing such a loving and thoughtful tribute. Celebrate all stages and phases of your mother’s being. I never knew my mom but feel there were some wonderful women I met along the way that acted as mommy. I celebrate these women who made a difference in my life. May you ever dwell in the eternal light of cosmic wisdom. Peace. Norma
Patricia, you definitely look like your mother. I could see you in her. Love the tribute you wrote to her. Thanks for sharing.
Yesterday, I celebrate my mama. I wrote a little piece dedicated to her. Her it comes.
Powerful writing, Patricia. Gathering all of your mother’s talents, skills, compassion, and examples of thorough “living” into this story shows the impact your Mom has on you. Thank you for sharing with us. The story I would write is about two women in their twenties, the first is 21 and the other is 27. Martha loved and kept me safe until my birth in 1944.Then Juanita, in the midst of intense war, adopted me and was the best of all mothers until her death in 1999. I have followed her example and teaching for my life journey. Happy Mother’s Day… Read more »
I’ll try this once more.
Linda, I’m a little behind in my reading but I wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your mother’s story. What a trooper she was! Our mothers were such great role models for their children. Thanks for sharing!
Linda, what a wonderful tribute to your momma.
Thanks, Etya.
My Mother